Learned words enough to count on two hands with this one! While at least "lunting" seems misused, mention of Satan/pagan/more modern devices here and there disorients, and descriptions sometimes reiterate more than add, I enjoy your overall command of your vocabulary as well as your taste for it. Funnily enough, I just resumed reading Harry Harrison's West of Eden epics, and there's something so inviting about the carefully crafted expansiveness the author gives his sentences and paragraphs, to characters and their experiences, that I don't remember why and can't fathom how I left my bookmark where it was. This story quite resembles it in texture. Is coincidence to blame?
At the sight of the scavenging didels, I expected Rilk to find solace in thinking he would carry into the future by fueling the calamity's survivors and their descendants, but we didn't quite go there. I'm glad he spends his final moments with some measure of hope even so...
Regarding "lunting"- it has two definitions. One form of lunting is a leisurely stroll with a pipe, which naturally does not fit here in the slightest. The other, which was the one I intended, is a descriptor of the dense, coiling sort of smoke emitted from a pipe.
I do have a great love for old, obscure vocabulary... you're 100% correct that sometimes I overindulge though. I feel this was an issue with "The Gytrash" as well. Did try to avoid some of the modern conventions you mentioned, but certain lines- the opening, for instance- just rang too nicely for me to cut. Hope it didn't detract too much!
West of Eden is a fantastic series. It's funny you bring it up- my initial working title for this story was "Dawn of the Endless Night," after the title of the Wayne Barlowe piece that inspired it. Unfortunately for me, I learned about halfway through the writing process that Harry Harrison ALSO wrote a short story to accompany this painting, which was also already titled "Dawn of the Endless Night," so I had to change the name of my story as a result. Harrison's is a great little tale as well, set in the world of the Yilane, and it is quite different from mine, despite revolving around the same event. Beyond this coincidence, however, Harrison's work was not of any influence here. Regarding Rilk's people, my mind kept wandering back to the Mutata of the Ray Bradbury Dinosaur World series; they and Rilk's species are both far more primitive than the ecotechnic mastery of the Yilane.
As for the end of Rilk, he was far too bereaved and deep in his death throes to have any such abstract, long-term hopes, though of course that is exactly what became of him.
Learned words enough to count on two hands with this one! While at least "lunting" seems misused, mention of Satan/pagan/more modern devices here and there disorients, and descriptions sometimes reiterate more than add, I enjoy your overall command of your vocabulary as well as your taste for it. Funnily enough, I just resumed reading Harry Harrison's West of Eden epics, and there's something so inviting about the carefully crafted expansiveness the author gives his sentences and paragraphs, to characters and their experiences, that I don't remember why and can't fathom how I left my bookmark where it was. This story quite resembles it in texture. Is coincidence to blame?
At the sight of the scavenging didels, I expected Rilk to find solace in thinking he would carry into the future by fueling the calamity's survivors and their descendants, but we didn't quite go there. I'm glad he spends his final moments with some measure of hope even so...
Good work!
Thank you very much, David! Glad you enjoyed it!
Regarding "lunting"- it has two definitions. One form of lunting is a leisurely stroll with a pipe, which naturally does not fit here in the slightest. The other, which was the one I intended, is a descriptor of the dense, coiling sort of smoke emitted from a pipe.
I do have a great love for old, obscure vocabulary... you're 100% correct that sometimes I overindulge though. I feel this was an issue with "The Gytrash" as well. Did try to avoid some of the modern conventions you mentioned, but certain lines- the opening, for instance- just rang too nicely for me to cut. Hope it didn't detract too much!
West of Eden is a fantastic series. It's funny you bring it up- my initial working title for this story was "Dawn of the Endless Night," after the title of the Wayne Barlowe piece that inspired it. Unfortunately for me, I learned about halfway through the writing process that Harry Harrison ALSO wrote a short story to accompany this painting, which was also already titled "Dawn of the Endless Night," so I had to change the name of my story as a result. Harrison's is a great little tale as well, set in the world of the Yilane, and it is quite different from mine, despite revolving around the same event. Beyond this coincidence, however, Harrison's work was not of any influence here. Regarding Rilk's people, my mind kept wandering back to the Mutata of the Ray Bradbury Dinosaur World series; they and Rilk's species are both far more primitive than the ecotechnic mastery of the Yilane.
As for the end of Rilk, he was far too bereaved and deep in his death throes to have any such abstract, long-term hopes, though of course that is exactly what became of him.
Thank you again for your kind words.
That was beautiful! I almost cried. :(
Thank you! This might sound weird, but that's actually the highest praise you could possibly have given.
Poor sweet Rilk. I love him.
What an inventive take on the KT event. Thank you!
Thank YOU for reading, Periwinkle! Glad you enjoyed.